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How to Stop Being Shy About Your Body

07/06/2020
Company of girls on the sea

Physical appearance plays an important role in the life of every person. While films, media, advertising, and celebrities broadcast ideal shapes and standards of beauty, many young women have a problem with self-rejection and accepting their natural bodies. When we do not accept our body, we do not enjoy life fully. We begin to disassociate and develop different complexes. Multiple aspects of our lives suffer from the fact that we simply do not accept ourselves as we are.

Why Am I Embarrassed by my Body?

There are various reasons why a person may begin to be self-conscious of their body. All of them can be divided into psychological and physiological reasons. Let’s consider each group in detail.

Psychological Reasons

  • It's all about childhood:

Usually the problems of an adult person formed in their childhood. Among these problems can be the assessment of their appearance. A child receives information about themself from their parents, teachers, and friends. Everything that a child is told about themselves is perceived as truth.

Let’s compare these ways of responding to a child who has misbehaved:

  1. “In this situation, you were wrong. You can’t do this because it can hurt someone.”

  2. “You were stupid to do this! How many times have I told you that only retarded children do this. You must be retarded.”

Little girls in dresses

With the first option, a child will analyze their act and understand that they made a mistake.

With the second option, a child can only understand that he or she is worse than other children. Adults, and parents most commonly, are authority figures to kids. Therefore, such seemingly minor phrases from an adult can leave a mark and have a huge impact on a child’s psyche. As they mature and become an adult, these childhood experiences will remain with them.

  • Social pressures:

Over time, there have always been different societal standards of beauty. In the times of Catherine II, being curvaceous was in fashion. Nowadays being sporty and thin is considered beautiful. Previously, women were not as pressured to fit these standards. However in our current times, global propaganda drives the 21st century ideals of beauty. These standards are broadcast almost everywhere we look and they root themselves in the human mind. They become a template which many feel they must fit into, otherwise they risk being ridiculed, rejected and misunderstood. A fear of being different drives many young women to be on exhausting diets, and causes them to feel that their body is the reason for the difficulties in their life.

  • Projection into other life areas:

A person who cannot realize their potential may become nervous, stressed and gain weight as a result. Later, they will notice that their reflection in the mirror is not the same as it used to be and they will become depressed and even more stressed. This cycle will continue if the person won’t make up their mind to stop suffering and to master themself and restore their health.

Physiological reasons

  • Inherent Trait Issues:

If a person has physical features that cannot be changed, for example, scars, birthmarks, moles, a tall or short stature, these can also often cause negative perceptions of appearance. Sometimes this can lead to serious difficulties in the form of psychological disorders like dysmorphophobia.

Girl with a flower in her hands
  • Diseases which cause a person to not be able to gain or lose weight:

These conditions can put a lot of pressure on a person and may lead to feelings of helplessness since they are unable to fix it.

How to Solve your Body Image Problems and Reclaim your Body

Living permanently in a negative mental complex is detrimental to your health. It negatively affects the nervous system and the body’s general functionality. Therefore, the underlying issues must be dealt with.

  • Step 1: Admit that the problem exists.

Before addressing a problem, you first need to understand the essence of the problem. You can start doing this on your own by developing self-awareness. Try to find the root cause of what ultimately led to the problem. Was it the constant jokes of relatives? Taunts of classmates? Physical ailments? How do these issues reveal themselves physically? Do you hunch your shoulders, avoid eye contact, or suck in your stomach. Ask yourself questions like these and pay attention to the answers. As you become aware, you will quickly understand why you have this kind of problem. If you feel that you can’t face it on your own, consult a psychologist. Mental health specialists can help you cope with your difficulties and often be able to help you address them faster.

  • Step 2: Remove false thought patterns from your mind.

Have you noticed that if you feel drawn to someone, then you don’t pay much attention to their looks? Realize that it is the same for people who are drawn to you. Social norms are not something that must be strictly followed, and even your biggest so-called flaws are special features that make you unique.

Smiling girl
  • Step 3: Transform your negative thoughts to positive ones.

Whenever you look at yourself in the mirror, notice what seems beautiful instead of focusing on what you don't like. And compliment yourself on your special features. At first it will seem unnatural, but with time and practice you will hone this skill and will begin to unconsciously focus and pay attention to your virtues instead of your perceived faults.

Work on your Body: How to Start and Where Areas to Focus On

Your body needs care and attention and care to remain in a healthy state. By working on your body, you are expressing love of self.

  • Switch to a healthy diet:

The body deserves your love. We need quality, healthy, clean, nutritious food. What we eat is absorbed and reflected by our body. Cleanse your fridge of junk food and fill it with healthy foods that will nourish and give you feelings of lightness and energy.

Nuts
  • Start exercising:

Physical activity will help you improve your body and it will give you positive emotions. Also, scientific discoveries show that regular exercise changes the perception you have of your body from negative into positive. Doing a variety of physical activities helps the proper production of endorphins, the happiness hormone.

  • Give up bad habits:

Smoking, drinking alcohol, eating sweets and fast food does not benefit your body. Not only do these activities have a negative affect on your appearance, they can also seriously harm your health. Show even more love to your body by giving up your bad habits.

How to Stop Being Shy in Bed with your Partner

When problems start in the bedroom, it affects the relationship. Often these problems are caused by one partner rejecting or critiquing the appearance of the other. What kind of pleasure can someone experience if they are worrying about how they look during an intimate moment? In order to build a healthy relationship, you must solve these problems.

Girl in bodysuit

Sexologists advise people to spend 15-30 minutes a day standing naked in front of the mirror, examining their body. Get to know it when you’re alone. This will help you see the natural beauty of your body and accept yourself.

In order to not think about your body while having sex, focus on the process. Think about how you feel and discover your reaction and what sensations you enjoy.

The main thing is self-perception. Everyone has unique features, but the way you see them determines a lot in your life.

Your body is a part of you. Love it and it will give you many wonderful sensations in return.


The aim of our service is to improve the quality of life and health. Please consult with a healthcare specialist before using the platform regarding the characteristics of your health conditions and contraindications.

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